How Fights Get Started

Nuthin' starts a good fight like a box of cereal.

Sitting Around The Locker Room

Several men are sitting around the locker room of a golf club when a mobile phone rings.  One of the men picks it up, and the following conversation ensues:

Husband - "Hello?"
Wife - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

Husband - "Yes, I am"
Wife - "Great!  I'm at the mall two blocks from where you are and I'm looking at a beautiful leather coat. It's absolutely gorgeous! Can I buy it?"

Husband - "What's the price?"
Wife - "Only $1,000."

Husband - "Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much."
Wife - "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealer and saw the 2015 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..."

Husband - "What price did he quote you?"
Wife - "Only $60,000"

Husband - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
Wife - "Great!  But before we hang up, just one more thing..."

Husband - "What?"
Wife - "I happened to stop by the real estate agent's office this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year for sale. The one with a pool, English garden and an acre of park area. The beach front property."

Husband - "How much are they asking?"
Wife - "Only $450,000.00 a terrific price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover it" 

A Husband Buys His Blond Wife A Cell Phone

A young husband wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited and loves her phone. He shows her how to use it and explains to her all the features on the phone.

The next day the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband, "So dear, how do you like your new phone?"

"I just love it" she replies "It's so small and your voice is so clear but there's one thing I don't understand though."

The Honeymoon

The reception had ended and the newlyweds had just arrived at their honeymoon resort. After supper and champagne, the groom retired to the bedroom. But Rebecca pulled a chair up to the balcony doors and sat there, gazing up at the stars. 

"Honey," asked the somewhat impatient husband. "Aren't you coming to bed?"

Nice Place For A Swing

She looks so trusting.....

He looks so ready to let her swing....

Various Quotes On Marriage and Such

"Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!"  -- Anonymous
  
"Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly." -- Voltaire

"Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished." -- Goethe