Three Blondes Are Walking Through The Forest

Three blondes are walking through the forest. They come upon some tracks.

The first blonde says "They're deer tracks."

The second blonde says "They're bear tracks."

The third blonde says "They're moose tracks."

Is There Anyone Who Can Make Me Feel Like A Women?

On a trans-Atlantic flight, a plane is passing through a severe storm when one of the wings is struck by lightning. One woman stands up in the front of the plane and starts screaming, "I'm too young to die!". 

Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! I've had plenty of love making in my life, but no one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well, I'’ve had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN??" 

For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. 

Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Tall, built, with flowing black hair and jet black eyes, he starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time. 

A Blonde A Brunette And A Redhead

In a fancy LA restaurant, there is a magical wish granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth -- if you lie, you disappear.

One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. 

"I think I'’m the smartest woman on earth." 

"POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try. 

"I think I'’m the prettiest woman on earth." 

"POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up.