Why Don't Big Planes Have Little Planes?

A mother and her young son were flying Delta Air Lines from New York to Detroit. The son turned from the window, looked at his mother and asked her, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" 

"Well," the mother said, "Maybe that's something you could ask the stewardess." 

So the boy asks the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" 

Quite The Car

Which way is forward?

A Guy Walks Into A Bar...

A guy walks into a bar, sits down and says to the bartender, "Quick pour me twelve shots." 

So the bartender pours him twelve shots and the guy starts throwing them back really fast, one after another. The bartender says to the guy, "You sure are drinking those drinks awful fast."

The guys says, "Well, you would be drinking really fast too if you had what I've got." 

The bartender says, "And what have you got?"

A Husband Buys His Blond Wife A Cell Phone

A young husband wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited and loves her phone. He shows her how to use it and explains to her all the features on the phone.

The next day the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband, "So dear, how do you like your new phone?"

"I just love it" she replies "It's so small and your voice is so clear but there's one thing I don't understand though."

Baseball In Heaven?

John and Cliff were best friends and so obsessed with baseball that they would go to 60 games a year and analyse everything. 

They even promised each other that when one of them goes to heaven, he would come back and tell the other whether there was baseball in heaven or not.

One night Cliff dies in his sleep after watching a Chicago White Sox game. The next day Cliff returns to earth to see his friend. 

"Hi, John." 
"Cliff, is it really you?" 
"Hey, I told you I'd be back to tell you what's up. And, you know John, there's good news and there's bad news."